As the sun begins to go down, after dinner has been tidied away, that’s when you start to sweat. Somehow you’ve got to get the two (or more!) of them clean and to bed without losing your mind. Surely there must be a way to have a calm bedtime routine with a baby and a toddler?
If you dread bedtime with your two tinies, then never fear. There is a way to manage it all without ending up rocking in a corner. And I’m here to take you through it.
Why is my baby and toddler bedtime routine so hectic?
Ok, first things first. Having 2 small children is hard. It’s hard enough when they’re both happy and healthy (and awake). But when they’re fighting sleep, refusing baths, and generally acting like they’d rather be nocturnal, it’s worse.
Bedtime routines with a baby and toddler is a juggling act. And you’re tired, which makes it harder. Your children don’t know what they want, or what they need. They just know what’s right in front of them, and that you’re trying to take it away and put them in a bath! No doubt, your toddler will be fractious from a busy day, and your baby might be cluster feeding between 5pm and 9pm.
So, what I’m trying to say is – you’re not doing it wrong, or missing the special bedtime routine formula that other parents have figured out!
Where does it go wrong?
It’s always worth doing an ‘analysis’ of your current routine to find out where it might be going disarray.
Where do the problems usually start? Is it when you get down from the dinner table? Is it pyjamas? Is it that the baby gets to sit on your lap during the story?
Watch out for areas that can cause problems and try to get ahead of them:
- Your bedtime routine might be too long (small children have a limited attention span)
- Everything is too exciting or interesting (watching a feeding baby might make it hard for your toddler to settle down to sleep)
- You’re trying to do everything at once (divide and conquer is key!)
How to build a calmer bedtime routine for baby and toddler
If you’d like to try and inject some calm back into your double-trouble bedtime, here’s my foolproof routine:
- Put them in the bath together. This way they’re safe, you don’t have to be in two places at once, and they can entertain each other.
- Give up your Zen dreams! The idealised light-dimmed, calm-music wind down isn’t always achievable, and that’s ok. As long as things aren’t too energetic, that’s perfectly fine at bedtime.
- Don’t be afraid of the TV. After the bath, if everyone’s a bit fractious decamp to the living room and put a suitable bedtime programme on the TV for the toddler. They’ll soon start calming down.
- Deal with the baby first. It’s far easier to put the baby to bed and then negotiate with the toddler, rather than trying to put the toddler to bed while negotiating with a screaming baby. So, give the baby their bottle, and then take them to bed while the toddler hangs out reading or doing a quiet activity somewhere nearby.
- Then it’s toddler time. Now you can spend time reading to your toddler, listening to their cute chatter, and getting that last glass of water!
With practice, this bedtime routine can help your children enjoy each other’s company and gain more independence. Not to mention save your sanity!
Need some help?
If you’re still struggling, then I have lots of resources for bedtime routines in my online courses. Or, if you’d like a more personal approach, let’s talk.
